Friday, September 16, 2016

Music Marketing Photos

Every time I see one of those absurdly hyped up photos of the latest classical virtuoso I want to write silly captions. So here goes.

Yuja Wang:

Oh god, oh god, oh god--I am so glad I got this "very special" piano bench!


Lang Lang:

No, I'm not here to give you the prostate exam, why do you ask?

Vanessa Mae:

Uh, Vanessa? Please tell me that is not what you are going to wear onstage!


Khatia Buniatishvili:

And that's why I didn't get the "tramp-stamp" tattoo. You know, the one on the lower back?

Simon Rattle and Lang Lang:

Lang Lang, if you rush those sixteenths one more time I'm going to pistol whip you with this baton!
Milos Karadaglic:

Well, yes, I did spend the summer working as a lumberjack. How did you guess?

Bond:

What's wrong with wearing flower diadems? We think they look very nice!

The Piano Guys:

Look, can we change the key on this one? Because if I hit that low F, this piano is going right over the edge!
And that's that for that! Please, this was all in good fun and I didn't want to offend anyone.


Much...

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